How Fear Quietly Talks Us Out of God’s Best

I’ve known Susie Larson for years, ever since I was a guest on her radio show and found myself deeply moved by her wisdom and wholehearted love for Jesus. Susie has a beautiful way of lifting your eyes beyond the hard, beyond the fear, beyond what feels impossible—and reminding you that God is always doing more than we can imagine. We’ve shared platforms, prayed backstage, and walked through hard seasons together. I can tell you: what Susie writes, she lives. It’s such a grace to welcome my dear friend Susie to the farm’s table today…

Guest Post by Susie Larson

One of the things I love about Jesus is that He never acted like a celebrity or a VIP.

He was not too big for small things. And never too small for big things. Jesus’ life was antithetical to the celebrity culture of our day.

And that’s why I wanted to stop speaking at women’s events.

Let me explain.

While God has accomplished so much in me through my battle with Lyme disease (along with chronic neurological symptoms as a result), it hasn’t exactly been a walk in the park. Ten years ago, I experienced a significant health relapse that felt like a journey through hell. Apparently, individuals with chronic Lyme issues also struggle with processing mold, which I had been unknowingly and repeatedly exposed to.

The mold affected my brain and cognitive function in a way that terrified me. I work every day doing live radio. Suddenly, my face, tongue, and neck would go numb, and I couldn’t remember the words I needed for my sentences. I was writing my umpteenth book but suddenly couldn’t recall how to spell basic words. I experienced stroke-like symptoms in the middle of the night, and my heart would beat wildly in my chest. 

On numerous occasions, I cried out to God, “Lord, You’re going to have to either take me or heal me. I don’t have the mental bandwidth to navigate this storm.”

When you travel across the country and speak at churches and conferences, you take a significant risk of staying in mold-infested buildings. It pained me to include the clause in my contract, “Marriott or better.” I feared being misunderstood and being lumped with those who demand accommodations because they think they are so important. 

But each time I took the risk of staying in an older hotel, the pressure in my head returned, along with the debilitating symptoms. 

One day, as my husband Kev and I checked into our room for a speaking event, I whispered to him, “I’m going to stop speaking after these next few events. I can’t keep asking people to accommodate me; it’s embarrassing. Maybe this isn’t the right thing for me.”

The next day after my first session, I stood behind my book table and looked at the line of women waiting to speak with me. Suddenly, I spotted a beautiful woman in vibrant clothing moving from the back of the line. 

When she finally reached me, she rested her hands on the book table, leaned in close to my face, pointed at me, and said, “Susie Larson. You listen to me. Don’t even think about quitting or turning back from the call of God on your life! God is the One who called you. He’s the One who will sustain you. Don’t you dare think about quitting!”

I sat there, stunned.

“I am a child of God, filled with the Spirit of the living God, and empowered by Him alone. I have authority in Christ on my weak days and my strong days.“

I watched her walk away, then looked up at Kev as if to ask what just happened. After the session, I searched for the woman and asked others if they had seen her. Nobody had. As Kev and I walked out of the conference center, he leaned in and said, “Leave it to God to give you a sassy, bossy angel to tell you what’s what.” I laughed out loud, but her words had pierced me too.

What was I afraid of? What was I trying to protect myself from?

• Being misjudged?
• Being lumped together with “celebrity Christians”?
• Getting sick again?

Was God not aware of my struggle? Yes, He was. Did He understand my fears? Absolutely. Did He care that some might misjudge me? He cared but wasn’t too worried about it because people misjudged Him all the time. They still do.

Is God big enough to handle my issues?

More than big enough.

Is my identity up for grabs just because I need a few accommodations? Not in the least. I am a child of God, filled with the Spirit of the living God, and empowered by Him alone. I have authority in Christ on my weak days and my strong days. On my messy days and my better-looking days. So do you.

I shudder to think what might have happened if I had quit early just to feel more comfortable.

“Setbacks are only temporary for those who serve in God’s kingdom.“

Something changed in me after my encounter with that beautiful angel of a woman.

I set my face like flint and knew I would triumph (Isaiah 50:7). Since then, we’ve experienced an upsurge in breakthroughs and even healings at our events. I’ve developed greater resilience to push through in less-than-ideal conditions. We see more fruit and favor in our obedience to God, especially when it’s risky or feels outside our comfort zone.

The Enemy of your soul would love for you to self-sabotage.

Preempt an outcome because you’re afraid or uncomfortable. You will face opposition, delays, and detours when you trust God and follow His lead. Don’t be dismayed by the obstacles; ask God to show you your strategy. Setbacks are only temporary for those who serve in God’s kingdom.

Just because something is hard doesn’t mean God’s not in it.

“Just because something is hard doesn’t mean God’s not in it. “

Anything that draws us into a deeper dependence on God is a blessing. Fruit comes from the abiding life (not from ideal circumstances that promise comfort and convenience). Favor surrounds us because God is good and because we dare to trust Him more than we trust ourselves or our circumstances.

You don’t need favoritism from man to flourish in your God-given purposes.

What you want and need is the favor of God—and you have it when you walk uprightly before Him.

You don’t need ideal circumstances to bear fruit—fruit grows where the heart is most tender, the soil is most prepared, and where God’s perspective is most embraced.

Do not fret if you are in an uncomfortable season. Fear God, trust Him, and watch Him grow you right where you’re planted.

He’ll move you, promote you, and empower you for your next place of promise when the time is ripe. 

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